Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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