I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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