I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
