carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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