There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize