I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
