Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Randomize
