she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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