Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
