I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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