did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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