What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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