Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize