I'm sorry my penis didn't work
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
The air was thick with penises
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
