yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
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