You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I just got carded by a ten year old.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
