Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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