It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
