He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
