I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
