are you so shy because you have an std?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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