My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
