That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
