therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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