after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize