wat bout pragnant strippers??
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize