just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize