Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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