# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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