Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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