I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
