My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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