id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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