...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
