Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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