Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
