we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize