Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
