You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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