I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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