She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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