Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
