you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
