People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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