You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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