he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize