I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize