Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
