I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
