it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
