Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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