break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
